Thoughts for Thursdays: Damn it, Gaga.

Originally, I had crossed my blog off my priority list for today. But then I found something on Netflix that I had intended to put on as background noise. And like a Kermit-flailing Athena, this rant sprang forth from my head fully formed.

Let me make a few things abundantly clear before I begin:

• I love the Muppets. 
• I marginally enjoy Lady Gaga. 
• I love the holiday season. 

Okay? Understood? Good. Because I don't know what I just watched, but it was the furthest thing from a Muppet Holiday Spectacular I have ever seen. 

DAMN IT, GAGA. 

And you know what? I had hopes. Not particularly high ones, but I had them. Gaga opens the show with a voice over about how the holidays for her growing up included The Muppets and their Christmas Specials. Alright, so she hooked me there. I love the Muppets, and I too watched (and still watch today) the older Muppet Christmas movies (WATCH OUT FOR THE ICY PATCH). 

And then the show started. Which holiday classic song were the Muppets performing? Well... they weren't. Gaga took the stage with her backup dancers to perform "Venus" from her new album ArtPop. The Muppets eventually join her toward the end of the song to sort of sway and sing along... but already I could this was going to be a train wreck. 

Normally I laugh along with Waldorf and Stadtler. It concerns me when I spend the whole special agreeing with them. ("There's nothing like a classic holiday song!" "And that was nothing like a classic holiday song.")

You would assume that a Holiday Spectacular would include...well, holiday music, right? Apparently not. Aside from two short inserts of Animal, Beaker, and the Swedish Chef doing their interpretations of holiday tunes, a performance of Santa Baby from Miss Piggy (which was a daydream), and a duet of Baby, It's Cold Outside between Gaga and Joseph Gordon-Levitt, the entire hour special was essentially an infomercial for Gaga's newest album. 

I don't hate Gaga. I usually enjoy her music. I get her schtick. But if you promise me a Muppet Holiday Spectacular, GIVE ME A MUPPET HOLIDAY SPECTACULAR. Not the Muppets casually swaying in the background as you sing half of the album you're trying to sell. It's the holidays. Give me holiday music and classics Muppet variety show shenanigans.

Was I happy to see Sir Elton John singing Bennie and the Jets? Of course! But I'd have rather seen him do a Christmas song with the Muppets. The whole show just felt canned, and I don't just mean the audience laughter. 

I'm disappointed. I'm going to go dig out A Muppet Family Christmas to bring my spirits back up. In the meantime, I'm locking this horror show away in the vault along with the Star Wars Christmas Special. 

...yeah. It was that bad. 

Thoughts for Thursdays: The Fault In Our Stars

Page 17. 

That's how long it took for John Green to put me on the verge of tears with his most recent book. Seventeen pages. I have to say that's a new record.

John Green's The Fault in Our Stars came out what feels like ages ago. (By ages I mean January of 2012. Which now that I look at it isn't really that long ago, but damn does it feel like this book sat on my shelf forever. I can be hyperbolic at times. Might want to get used to it. Also literal. Or at least I use the word "literally" correctly, which I suppose Hazel and Augustus would appropriately enjoy. Good lord, that's a long parenthetical. Oh, the blessings of non-academic writing.) I pre-ordered my copy, and I am the proud owner of a magenta J-Scribble. (...yeah, it's complicated. Just go watch this video. The man himself can explain the mess far better than I can.) I put my faith in his writing. I own copies of Looking for Alaska, An Abundance of Katherines, and Paper Towns. I've loved all his work so far, so I had little doubt that I would enjoy The Fault in Our Stars. (Hereafter called TFiOS, because come on, I'm not typing the title every time. That's just crazy talk. And I have feels to spill, so that's my priority.)

It took me awhile to finally pick up TFiOS. Between school and a million other factors, it just stayed with my other books untouched until now. But I made the choice to pack it in my carry on bag for my flight home for the holidays. My first flight was from Syracuse to Chicago. At some point during the flight it hit me that I could be flying over Indianapolis...whether I did or not, I don't care. In my mind I was.

Two things struck me most as I started reading. One, it doesn't feel like a "cancer book." I'm not quite sure how to describe it, but while yes, cancer plays a role, that's not what the book is about. I'd describe TFiOS the same way Hazel describes her favorite book, An Imperial Affliction: "But it's not a cancer book, because cancer books suck." TFiOS isn't a book about two teenagers with cancer. It's a book about two teenagers. Now, I know what you're thinking. A book, about teenagers. And that's it? How can this be? Well, technically, no, that's not it, but at the core of the story it is about Hazel and Augustus. I know, revolutionary idea. A story about... the two main characters. Mind boggling. But it works, mostly because of the second thing that struck me as I read it.

Hazel and Augustus feel real and honest. They are teenagers. I can hear their voices as I read. I can hear their inflections. I can hear the sass, the snark, the sarcasm, all of it. I hear Hazel telling the story as if she's sitting next to me, telling it with crazy, flailing hand gestures, snarky side comments and all. I feel like I'm talking to a friend, a close friend. Of course, that only makes it all the more painful and heart wrenching.

Sitting down to try and describe the emotions TFiOS evokes is hard. When I read it, I was a gibbering, emotional mess. I gasped out loud as I read it, I cried, I laughed, I turned pages more quickly hoping that it would somehow make it end...better. Don't get me wrong, the ending is beautiful, but it hurts. You become Hazel's best friend from page one, and you will become invested in the events that unfold. And it will hurt. But somehow, it's a good hurt. You'll feel better for having known these characters for what time you spent reading.

I feel like I'm not doing this book justice. I want you to read this book, but I also want you to experience the events of it organically. I want you to fall in love with Hazel and Augustus the way I did. I understand now why John was so intent on readers not spoiling what happens. It makes perfect sense. If you know precisely what is coming, it ruins it somehow. It is a part of the experience I won't take away from you. (And it only occurs to me now that it's maybe strange to refer to a New York Times Best Selling Author by his first name. I don't know him personally. It feels as if we, the fans that is, do sometimes though. Not once did it occur to me to call him John Green, or Mr. Green, or anything remotely...pretentious like that. I suppose that's a whole blog post of its own for another time.)

The Fault in Our Stars isn't just a good book. It is one of the best books I've ever read. I'd like to say that's just me being hyperbolic, but it is. Very few books have ever moved me the way TFiOS does. And for that reason, I recommend you read it. Plus, they're making a movie. They filmed it over the summer, and it is set to be released on June 6th, 2014, starring Shailene Woodley as Hazel Grace Lancaster and Ansel Elgort as Augustus Waters. I'll be watching, and I hope you will too.

You can find the author, John Green, on Youtube as half of The Vlogbrothers. You can also find him on twitter as @realjohngreen. For more information on the movie, check out @TFIOS_Movie on twitter.

Thoughts for Thursdays: Airport Observations

If you're reading this, I am either in an airplane somewhere above the Midwest or stuck in Chicago if the weather is bad.

Scratch that. I wrote that last night, thinking I'd be really productive and get this written and scheduled to post. Clearly not the case.

Pro-Tip for Flying #1: Never assume anything.

Pro-Tip for Flying #2: Always over plan and show up at least an hour before you're even meant to board the plane.

Trust me. You'll thank me when you are sitting on your flight on time to your destination.

Now, ladies and gentlemen, I'll return you to your regularly scheduled rambling.

The Syracuse-Hancock International Airport isn't the largest airport I've ever been in, but it has a lot in common with the others I've visited.

Airports have always fascinated me. The first time I flew was my senior year for a class trip to Washington, D.C. and our return flight from New York City. I didn't think much of the experience at the time. Our teachers were bustling us through the airport, making sure all forty of us actually made it on the plane. But since then, I've flown more, and I've observed much more as well.

Once upon a time way back in high school, my drama teacher schooled us in the art of people watching. It was a basic drama class, so we were learning basic observation skills. One point always hit home: everyone has a story. You may not know the person, you may not see them for any more than a few seconds as they run past you, but they have a story. No place is this more true than an airport. An airport isn't like a coffee shop or a park; you don't go there just to be there. Everyone in an airport is there for a specific reason. Some are passengers, some are staff, some are only there to drop another person off, but everyone has a purpose.

After a while you start to recognize certain types of people in airports. The business types are easy to pick out, briefcases in hand, on their phones and usually looking a bit haggard or irritated. The sleep deprived parents are also easily spotted. Strollers nearby, or just follow the sound of cranky children. Coming or going, everyone has somewhere else they would rather be. Yes, some people will be rude and belligerent (stress does weird things to people, that's just a fact of life), but in my experience most are pretty calm and collected.

Pro-Tip for Flying #3: If you have time to spare and walk around, be aware of your surroundings. You may not be in a hurry, but the person sprinting behind you to catch their flight may be. Be courteous.

Pro-Tip for Flying #3B: Be nice to everyone, but especially the staff and crew members. Yes, that includes the TSA. They're just doing their jobs. Don't be a dick.

Even some of my most insane experiences in airports have been memorable. One of my most pleasant memories of flying happened in Chicago. It was Memorial Day, and I was flying to New York. I was moving to New York, practically alone because my husband was overseas. But I had graduated and was on my way. My connecting flight was in Chicago, and the flight from Chicago to Watertown got delayed enough that I had time to stop for lunch. It was a rough day honestly. When your husband is deployed and the airport plays Taps about every half hour it starts to get to you.

I went into a restaurant and was grabbing a table when a woman got my attention. She asked if I was eating alone, and when I said I was, she offered me a seat and asked me to join her. A glass of red wine in hand, she told me she didn't believe in eating alone when you can avoid it. The sentiment alone cheered me up and I joined her. We talked and had lunch, and while I don't remember all the details of the conversation, I remember having a genuinely pleasant experience. We shared stories. We had great conversation, and though I doubt I'll ever see her again it is a memory I won't forget.

Everyone has a story. As a writer, part of me watches and tries to think of those stories. But sometimes you're lucky enough to hear them. Either way, it makes airports all the more interesting to me.

And now, if you'll excuse me, I have a flight to board.